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It’s amazing how bound a paycheck can reinvent itself as a ruffled, sea blooming cocktail dress and a scattering of genital-shaped confetti. There’s no absolute analysis to appraise the boilerplate civic bulk of actuality a bridesmaid, but $1,500 is generally bandied about. In the following of non-scientific studies and authentic curiosity, we afresh asked women acquaint us abundant they spent, how it bankrupt down, and how they acquainted about it. The everyman bulk we got was $60 and the accomplished was $3,000…but afterwards account all 66 responses, it was bright that it’s not absolute the bulk spent, but how it’s spent that absolutely affairs to best maids.

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Here are some of their stories…

Age: Withheld

Wedding area and date: 2009 in Pemaquid Point, Maine

Relationship with the bride: Best acquaintance from aerial school

How abundant did you absorb on the bridesmaid dress, including alterations?

Thanks to the admirable bride, I spent $175 on a J. Crew dress. The dress was originally $250, but she begin every accessible abatement for all 11 of her bridesmaids. We accumulated discounts and ordered during a auction time that she alerted us to. I spent $0 on alterations because I bought the dress in my baby size, allotment out of the eight or nine options of which cut looked best for me.

Have you beat the dress again?

Yes, I’ve beat it consistently aback I got it.

What about hair, makeup, and any shoes and jewelry?

We did our own beard and makeup! Amid 11 bridesmaids, there are apparently still blockhead pins ambuscade in that auberge room. I bought the actual simple argent bandage earrings she requested, and the shoes were up to us, so I acclimated what I already had.

How abundant did you absorb on the conjugal battery and bachelorette party?

I didn’t absorb any money on the conjugal battery because it was out of state, I had no money, and I forgot to accelerate a gift. For the bachelorette party, I anticipate I spent about $200. I took the bus from New York to Boston, afresh got a ride with a acquaintance to Cape Cod, area we spent the weekend at a friend’s family’s house. We went to a bar one night in analogous T-shirts. It was a thing.

How abundant did you absorb on biking for wedding?

Getting from New York City to Maine afterwards a car would accept been badly complicated if not for accompany from out of boondocks who flew into New York. We busy a car for the weekend, so it was apparently $100 per person.

Did you accord a gift?

I went in on the allowance that my parents got, which is to say I active their agenda (see beneath re: alum school). But I did accord the helpmate some absolutely nice architecture the morning of the wedding, and I acquainted absolutely adequate giving her article that she didn’t accept to share.

How did the helpmate and/or her ancestors advice accumulate costs down?

Ashley (the bride), her sister, and her mom were ON IT from the actual beginning. They were organized and absorbed in authoritative the accomplished action easier and fun for the accomplished assemblage of 11 extensive bridesmaids.

I aloof stumbled aloft an email that absolutely sums up the accomplished experience. In the anniversary arch up to the wedding, Ashley’s admirable sister Courtney beatific an email to all of the bridesmaids with a little branch thanking anniversary of us for specific things that we did as a allotment of the process. Aside from that, they gave us all absolutely air-conditioned swag accoutrements with flip-flops, a chaplet to abrasion for the wedding, and a agglomeration of added little things that I kept.

Any final thoughts?

I admired aggregate about it. I still adulation cutting that dress! I aloof searched my email for advice about this bells and about all of the emails are active “WHY DID I GO TO GRAD SCHOOL” so…yeah.

Age: 27

Wedding area and date: May 2014 in London

Relation to the bride: Best acquaintance from college

How abundant did you absorb on the bridesmaid dress, including alterations?

She was actual assertive that the bridesmaids would accept Vivien of Holloway dresses, that she paid for. This was an amazing gesture, but as addition who is 5’11”, and plus-size, I knew they wouldn’t fit me. She bought me a dress three sizes too baby and said I’d accept to get it modified. I took it to a clothier with bolt from the artist and had it fabricated bigger for £50. The helpmate absolutely did not appetite me to get it fabricated bigger, she capital me to fit in it as it was, and she was actual awkward about the accomplished situation.

What about hair, makeup, and any shoes and jewelry?

I spent £25 on adornment she chose afore alteration her mind, and £30 on shoes. She additionally had us absorb £20 on a lipstick she capital us to wear.

How abundant did you absorb for the conjugal battery and bachelorette party?

I catholic two hours to the conjugal battery afterwards actuality ailing with a doubtable stroke. I spent £40 on a chaplet for her and a allowance for her mom, who hosted. I didn’t go to the capital bachelorette affair because I was still sick; I couldn’t allow it! I spent £40 on a architecture affair at her house.

How abundant did you absorb on biking for the wedding?

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Coral Wedding Dresses Plus Size – Carley & Connellan – coral mother of the bride dress plus size | coral mother of the bride dress plus size

After spending £300 on trips to London by alternation for dress shopping, I was kicked out of the wedding.

What happened?

After the bachelorette party, she larboard a bulletin cogent me my beard wasn’t an adequate color. I had blush beard with actual continued roots (due to my illness, I hadn’t absolute it in a while), and was told I wasn’t accustomed to accumulate it blush or dye my roots, as her beard was to be pink.

As time went on, I began accepting dozens of letters a day, via Facebook, email, and text, from the helpmate and her mom, allurement questions and authoritative demands. I was told I wasn’t committed enough, or giving abundant of my time to actuality bridesmaid. In the end, she told me I wasn’t focused on her bells and that I was no best acceptable in her conjugal party, but I could still appear the bells as a bedfellow if I wished. I beneath and accept not announced to her since.

Age: 34

Wedding area and date: April 2009 in Queens

Relationship with the bride: College roommate

How abundant did you absorb on the bridesmaid dress, including alterations?

$40 — it was from Target and it didn’t charge any alterations.

Have you beat the dress again?

I re-wore it about four years after for addition bells I was a bridesmaid in. Best $40 I’ve anytime spent.

What about hair, makeup, and any shoes or jewelry?

The helpmate spent about $100 per actuality to get our beard done. I bought new flats bisected off (~$40 at Banana Republic) that I wore frequently.

How abundant did you absorb for the conjugal battery and bachelorette party?

There was no conjugal shower. For the bachelorette party, I spent about $80 on penis straws/party favor things from Spencer’s Gifts and about $100 on food/drinks/activities for an black out in New York. I didn’t accept to travel.

How abundant did you absorb on biking for wedding?

Nothing. The bells was local.

Did you accord a gift?

Yes, I spent about $100 on a set of silverware.

Any final thoughts?

We’re best friends, so I was actual blessed to be there for her that day. She was a bridesmaid in my wedding, and the dress she wore for that was added expensive, so if anything, I’m the jerk! My bridesmaids banned my choices for dresses and begin an $80 dress at Anthropologie they all admired bigger (my bells was at the zoo and the dress had flamingos all over it), and in the end they looked abundant — it was way bigger than the added arid ones I had picked.

Age: 29

Wedding date and location: May 2015 in Cleveland

Relationship with the bride: Best acquaintance for added than 10 years

How abundant did you absorb on the bridesmaid dress?

A little beneath $200 including alterations. I spent $30–50 to add spaghetti straps, booty in the bust, and let out the waist and hips. I told the helpmate I anticipation the dress was too expensive, but I wasn’t able to be there aback the added girls absitively on the dress, so my assessment wasn’t heard.

What about hair, makeup, and any shoes or jewelry?

The helpmate paid for bisected of our hair, but not for architecture — maybe $75 per actuality for both. She gave us earrings and necklaces to abrasion as a gift. The bridesmaids absitively to abrasion nude shoes, which I already owned.

How abundant did you absorb for the conjugal battery and bachelorette party?

I breach the bulk of a KitchenAid mixer with two added bridesmaids as a conjugal battery gift, so it was ~$50. Then, the mother of the helpmate asked for money from all the bridesmaids AFTER THE SHOWER — about $125 per person. I was actual agitated about this, because she didn’t acquaint any of us that she accepted us to accord financially. We were scrambling on the day of to pay the caterer.

For the bachelorette party, I contributed about $200 for a limo, auberge room, drinks, a tiara, beads, etc.

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How abundant did you absorb on biking for wedding?

I spent $150 for one night at a hotel, which was abutting to area I live.

Did you accord a gift?

Yes, I crocheted her a blanket. I apparently spent beneath than $50 on yarn and materials, but it took me a few weeks to accomplish the blanket, alive on it for a few hours every added day or so.

Any final thoughts?

After this wedding, which was my third time actuality a bridesmaid, I absitively I would absolutely alternate at actuality a bridesmaid again, and I additionally absitively not to accept bridesmaids at my wedding.

It additionally opened my eyes to the accuracy of the accord amid my BFF and her mother, and the accent that the bells planning action put on their relationship. I fabricated a affiance to myself that already I alpha planning for my wedding, I would not let my mother behest the decisions, and my fiancé and I are allegiant on advantageous for aggregate ourselves so we can accomplish it our bells and not our parents’ wedding.

Age: 27

Wedding area and date: May 2013 in California

Relationship with the bride: Best acquaintance from college

How abundant did you absorb on the bridesmaid dress, including alterations?

$320 for the dress and shoes. I got to accept the cut of the dress, not the color. Alterations were an added $90.

Did you abrasion the dress again?

No. It isn’t my admired color, but it is absolutely beautiful and was a adulatory cut.

What about hair, makeup, and any shoes or jewelry?

The helpmate able us some absolutely beautiful adornment to abrasion for the commemoration that I apparently would accept beat afresh if I could bethink area I put them. The helpmate and her ancestors additionally paid for our hair, nails, and makeup.

How abundant did you absorb for the conjugal battery and bachelorette party?

I autonomous out of the shower, aback I had to do a lot of aerial and advantageous for the added things. The bachelorette affair came out to $1,000 for the flight to Atlanta, the room, lots of bistro and drinking, and favors.

How abundant did you absorb on biking for wedding?

It was $400 for a flight to California, $250 for a auberge allowance for one night, and $50 for assorted expenses.

Did you accord a gift?

Yes, I anticipate it was about $100 — I bought one affair off the anthology for $50 and addition beautiful claimed affair to supplement.

How did the helpmate and/or her ancestors advice accumulate costs down?

The added bridesmaid was added accessible with the helpmate and her ancestors about not actuality able to allow a lot of things, so they helped her out because they could. I am assertive that if I had asked, they would accept helped me but I didn’t out of pride, and additionally because I absolutely capital to be able to accomplish it assignment on my tiny salary, alike aloof to say I could. The helpmate and her ancestors additionally paid for best of the aliment during the bells weekend itself.

Any final thoughts?

At the time, I was cool cool broke. Hilariously broke. And I was alive freelance so it was double-negative costs on canicule I was out of boondocks because I was advantageous to leave AND not accepting paid to work. But I was additionally angrily clandestine about how little I was authoritative and affected about not actuality college up, so I didn’t say annihilation and aloof somehow managed to pay for all of it. I didn’t booty any added vacations or canicule off that year. And I should affliction it or feel absinthian about it but I don’t. It was absolutely fun and it fabricated me absolutely anticipate added about allurement anyone abroad to appear annihilation that costs a lot of money in the approaching because you can never apperceive what someone’s banking bearings is.

Age: 29

Wedding area and date: July 2014 in Costa Mesa, California

Relationship with the bride: Acquaintance from aerial school

How abundant did you absorb on the bridesmaid dress, including alterations?

The dress was a Vera Wang dress from David’s Bridal, and it was $180. It was the best big-ticket bridesmaid dress they had. It was a long, flowy, ablaze blush clothes — not my style. I didn’t accept to get any alterations, though.

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Did you abrasion the dress again?

Never. It was frayed and bedraggled at the basal from cutting it all night, so it anon went to Goodwill the abutting day.

What about hair, makeup, and any shoes or jewelry?

The helpmate paid for our beard and architecture as allotment of our allowance and she gave us a armlet we all wore as allotment of our gift. We did accept to buy shoes from Aldo for $75.

How abundant did you absorb for the conjugal battery and bachelorette party?

$80 for the conjugal battery and $600–$800 for the bachelorette party.

Did you accord a gift?

Yes, I gave them $100 in cash.

Any final thoughts?

I feel it was a absolute decay of money. I never allege to that helpmate now and almost did afore she asked me to be in her wedding. I acquainted unappreciated and like it was all for her and her aloof absent a bells to be a assertive way aback “that’s how it’s declared to be.” Annihilation acquainted genuine. She additionally seemed bad-tempered the absolute time. It was not a adequate experience, and I would adulation to go aback and say no to actuality her bridesmaid.

After actuality a bridesmaid a few times, I apparently won’t accept a bells or alike a conjugal affair — it’s aloof not my appearance and I anticipate it’s a decay of money. I wouldn’t accomplish all my bridesmaids buy a assertive dress I capital or shoes. If I did aces out a dress, I would accomplish abiding it was actual reasonable (nothing over $100) and would let them aces out their own appearance and not accomplish them all abrasion the aforementioned dress. Also, I anticipate authoritative anybody pay for aggregate on a Vegas bachelorette affair is ridiculous.

Age: 30

Wedding area and date: August 2013 in Seattle

Relationship with the bride: College roommate

How abundant did you absorb on the bridesmaid dress, including alterations?

$178 — the helpmate and I chose one and the added bridesmaids did not like it, so we beatific it aback and concluded up allotment a altered one instead. She was actual accessible about it and alike let us change her absolute blush arrangement because of it! The aboriginal dress was coral, which she wanted, and the dress we concluded up allotment was hot pink. It didn’t charge any alterations.

What about hair, makeup, and any shoes or jewelry?

The bridesmaid allowance was our beard and architecture for the wedding. She had us abrasion “nude” shoes (beige, I’m white), and simple dangly argent earrings.

How abundant did you absorb for the conjugal battery and bachelorette party?

I didn’t go to the conjugal battery because it was in Seattle and I alive on the East Coast. The bachelorette affair was added than $1,000: $600 for the flight to San Francisco, $120 for a allocation of the Airbnb, $90 for a wine bout and limo rental, $50 for a Bay to Breakers costume, $200 for aliment and drinks, and $50 for a gift.

How abundant did you absorb on biking for the wedding?

The flight from D.C. to Seattle was $650, and the auberge allowance for one night was $120. I backward at my mother’s the added nights. Banquet and drinks from the added nights I was in Seattle for the bells came out to $200.

Did you accord a gift?

Yes, I spent $70 total. It was a $20 bassinet from Rwanda, abounding with $50 account of accidental kitchen items she wanted.

How did the helpmate and/or her ancestors advice accumulate costs down?

Along with advantageous for the beard and makeup, her ancestors gave us chargeless food/drink at the call dinner, wedding, and post-wedding brunch/bbq.

Any final thoughts?

I admired actuality her bridesmaid — it was fun and I adulation her and capital to abutment her. I didn’t apprehend how big-ticket it was until aloof now! It’s a little ridiculous, but it was fun for me too, so I feel OK about it.

Interviews accept been agilely edited for breadth and clarity.

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